So I am at the restaurant the other day and I am having a hard time squeezing behind this guy that was sitting waaaaayyyyy too far back in his chair....he appeared to be a little rough around the edges and looked like "that guy". You know, the one that would be all sorts of pissed off if you asked him to push in.
As I spent the next hour doing my best not to bump him with my enormo belly or wide ass, I was getting more and more annoyed. It was so obvious I was having difficulty getting around him, the people he was with could clearly see it too!! Push your damn chair in!!!! I was really beginning to think the guy was a major ass and was relieved to see that they were paying their tab and leaving. I was thinking in my head how I try hard to be conscious of others at all times, at the grocery store, at stop lights and stop signs, in traffic, when my kid is freaking out in public, etc.
My indignant attitude quickly turned into one of sheer embarassment, as this man stood up and put on his ball cap with a purple heart and began limping out. It was clear as he was standing he had a prosthetic leg (unable to bend it and sit closer to the table for those of you that aren't getting it...) He said thank you, and told me to have a nice day. I just tried to smile and hide my embarassment as it was so clear now who the ass truly was.
Now I know we hear stories like this all the time, but it affected me differently especially because I was the one being such a big pooper about the whole thing. I had already made up in my mind what this guy was like, how he would react to a simple question without any indication of who he was at all. I completely and unfairly judged him. Here I was feeling like I was superior because I thought I had such a "giving attittude" and this guy had truly made a sacrifice in a way I would never know or understand.
This brings me to my next gripe. I have recently noticed a lot of pissing and moaning on Facebook, my FB friends complaining about seeing people use their food stamps to by lavish groceries. There was one just the other day about someone watched a guy buy beer, lobster and steak with his food stamps.....of course someone relpied that the guy was also probably driving an Escalade....really?
Unless you know the person, you don't know what is going on in their life and it is 100% not your place to judge. First, let's explore how you knew the guy was using Food Stamps. In Maine, the food stamp credits are placed on a something like a credit card so unless you are watching the person closely, how the hell could you tell what kind of a credit card they were paying with!? Furthermore, would you want someone watching you as closely while you pay your tally?! Second, I am not even going to go into the claim that the guy was buying beer with food stamps....it's not possible...so either it wasn't food stamps or the claim was inflated....which is really neither here nor there at the end of the day...it really brings me to, IT'S NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS!
Perhaps this guy was celebrating his birthday? an anniversary? landed a new job? a nice treat for himself after he just put his dog down? Do you really think he should have been buying canned green beans and SPAM? My point is, you don't know his situation so stop trying to get into his business and judge him. I would hate to for someone judge you should you ever find yourself in his shoes...
As a former social worker, I do know that there are some out there that abuse the system. That is definitely a character flaw with that person, however it is more of a system issue than anything else. Opportunist are everywhere waiting to strike when the opportunity arises, focus on changing the system instead of the poor shmuck you don't know anything about at the store....and what the hell, focus on changing your attititude towards complete strangers!
Focus on making life better for others and yours will be better in return. Thank the universe for it's neccesity to have balance.
It's been 45 minutes since my last meal, time to eat again.
Preggo Out
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